Back by popular demand (and because I’ve received so many bad OkCupid messages that I’m starting to think these men know I’m collecting them), here’s a compilation of some of the best bad emails I’ve received lately. They are unedited, they are unfiltered, and they definitely didn’t get a response. 1. “So when are […]
August 6, 2013
Ok guys, I’m not saying that every message you’re sending me on an online dating site needs to be an individually crafted personal ode to why I’m the perfect girl for you. In fact, that sounds really creepy. More often than not, a simple “Hey, how are you?” does the trick just fine. With that […]
July 3, 2013
Sure, I like a guy who’s in touch with his feminine side—who’s not afraid to cuddle or watch a romantic comedy—but Scott, a recent online find, had me actually worried about what might be between his legs. Why? There were four reasons: 1. The face. I told him I was going to my sister’s graduation a […]
May 30, 2013
Jon, an online find, treated our first date like a game of 20 questions, complete with well-thought-out, conversation-starting brain teasers that he’d clearly memorized many dates ago. What he hadn’t practiced, however, was how to seamlessly slip them into conversation. As soon as there was the slightest lull, he’d hit me with, What were you […]
May 7, 2013
Grouper is probably the least creepy way to online date. Why? Your friends are with you the whole time. The main reason I started this blog was so I could say, “Hey friends, look how awful this date is going!” But on a Grouper, all I need is a safe word and I can easily […]
March 18, 2013
Brett was an OkCupid find. Online, he seemed well-educated and sweet. In person, it turns out, he was more of an ignorant asshole. Here are a few examples of our first date conversations: Raz: “A friend of mine is going through a bad break up, but the best way to get over someone is…” Brett: […]
December 14, 2012
Continuing a fun tradition I started a while back (here), these are a few of the most awesomely bad messages I received throughout the month of November. The emails are in their entirety and have unfortunately not been edited at all. “So am I eventually going to get a message back? If not, let me […]
November 16, 2012
Aaron and I met on JDate. He was 32, worked in finance and was kind of a cutie. I was excited when he asked me out, but our original date plans got all screwed up by Hurricane Sandy, so we resorted to a weeklong text conversation. Our text flirting was going well, and when both […]
October 24, 2012
One Saturday night, my friend Fiona invited me to a party hosted by her friend Sara. Though I didn’t know anyone there, and had only met Sara a couple times, I assumed there would be plenty of eligible bachelors. (Sara had recently started law school. Cha ching!) Fiona and I showed up to the bar […]
October 15, 2012
I was excited about Eddie. In his JDate photos, he was super hot, tall and athletic. Plus, our emails proved that we actually had a lot in common. After about 5 messages back and forth, he asked for my number, which I happily handed over. When he called me the next night, I was nervous […]
Real dates, real men, real disasters
November 15, 2013
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